Intervention
by xmenfan33
Summary: After the teens realize the cable's out, they decide to help those who they feel caused the problem. Part of the Define Normal series.
1. Chapter 1 Hairspray

**DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT OWN THE X-MEN OR X-MEN EVOLUTION.**

 **Storyline:**

 **After the teens realize the cable's out, they decide to help those who they feel caused the problem. Part of the Define Normal series.**

Intervention

Chapter One

Hairspray

The residents of Xavier's had had all they could take. Over the last few months, their lives had been turned upside down not once or twice but a grand total of seventeen times. For hairspray. To be more accurate, Logan's obsession with hairspray.

Sure, the kids had all heard the horror stories of life without hair products from Logan himself. Sure they had heard how terrifying Logan was without his hair properly controlled from Remy and Rogue (who were the most stoic, easy going members of the team...for this month, they voted and those two won...there may have been some bribes and threats involved but they still won darn it.) Sure the Professor claimed that hairspray wasn't the reason for this latest budget cut. The kids weren't buying it though.

Clearly, Logan needed help with his addiction. They all knew it, it said so on the reality show they had been watching before Bobby screamed. " Oh my God guys, that's the answer! Logan needs an intervention!"

Before anyone could respond, the cable went out. The Professor warned them this morning that it would, that he had to make some more budgets cuts that had included letting go of the cable completely, but none of the kids had really believed him. After all, everyone had cable. How could anyone NOT have cable? What were you supposed to do without tv?

Scott, who was once again on the 'active reserve' roster (for the last two days) had been about to tell Bobby that it was a bad idea. Then the cable went out,as previously mentioned. Scott had been grounded from all electronic devises following his 'prank' of kidnapping Wanda and had just been given back his tv privileges that day. Suddenly Bobby seemed right, because it had been four LONG months since the last time he'd watched tv. All three of his favorite shows had ended their seasons while he'd been grounded. Two very very important movies had debuted while he was grounded. An infomercial about making your own homemade swiss rolls had played while he was grounded! It was to replay today, after this stupid show which was the entire reason he'd been in here.

Scott had been working, for the last four months, on his obsession. He'd forgiven Remy and Rogue's betrayals. He'd pretended to forgive Wanda's. He'd said he was 'over' this whole snack cake phase. All so he could get his tv privileges reinstated and learn how to make his own snack cakes so that he would never again be without his one true love. And Logan's obsession with his hair had just ruined his only chance to see it! (This week, it was replaying again next week, not that Scott remembered at the moment).

"Bobby's right!" Scott said as the others stared at the screen, horror struck. " Logan's obsession needs to be stopped before it completely takes over his life! I know how it damages you to let that happen, it nearly happened to me once, as shocking as many of you may find it. "

"No! You? Obsessed with something completely stupid to the point no one even wants to be in the same room as you, but are to afraid of you to sneak away? Who would have guessed?" Kitty said with as much sarcasm as she could muster.

"I know it's shocking Kitty, but it's entirely true." Scott said, somehow completely missing Kitty's tone of voice. " Which is why we mush help Logan now, before it's too late."

Kitty rolled her eyes,humphed, and went back to attempting to write an email, a feat which was proving very difficult in the crowded room. Meanwhile, with nothing on tv, the rest of the kids decided Bobby and Scott were right. Logan clearly need help. So Scott and Bobby finally sat back down to work out a plan to save Logan so they could once again watch tv.

~0~O~0~

Logan was happily stirring a huge, thirty person, pot of chili. He was busy thinking about the flower garden, or more accurately the 'who can expand the west garden faster' competition Victor had suggested this morning when all of a sudden, the kids surrounded him. Logan raised an eyebrow, he casually asked what they needed. Then he was jumped on by Scott, Bobby, Sam, Roberto, John, Piotr, Lance, Todd, Pietro, and for some reason Tabitha. (She had been told to stay back, but jumped in anyway.) Before Logan could react, a pillowcase was shoved over his head, and the girls wrapped a rope around him. Jean, Jubilee, Kitty, Amara, and Wanda then stood back while the guys (and Tabitha) struggled back to their feet and they drug Logan from the room. No one seemed to think to turn off the burner under the chili, but hopefully it would be alright.

Logan's primary concern, when they removed the pillowcase a few minutes later, was the chili.; followed by his hair. He then noticed that they had pushed the table against the wall and placed all of the chairs in a huge circle, leading him to wonder how he had managed to miss the noises that had to have been coming from the next room. Then he remembered the lovely new music player Kitty and Rogue had given him this week for his 'birthday' which he had been listening to before the kids came in.

It hadn't actually been Logan's birthday (maybe), but at the time Remy had gotten it into his head to assign everyone who didn't know (or wouldn't tell)their birthdays a new one and convinced Kitty,Rogue, and Bobby that it was a great idea. It had been raining that day and the kids had been bored. Logan felt as far as 'bored schemes' went it had been fairly harmless until now when he began to question if it had actually been part of...whatever this was.

Probably not, he decided when he realized that the only ones missing from the group were Remy and Rogue, and that all of the chairs were full. "Where are Stripes and Gumbo? You tie them up too?" He asked while trying to undo the knots without breaking Xavier's very expensive chair.

"Remy and Rogue are far to Stoic and Easy Going to be useful in an intervention Logan." said Scott. "Plus they are playing Alien Smash 5000. No one is dumb enough to interrupt Alien Smash 5000."

Logan snorted back a laugh at the idea of either of the southerners being in any way 'easy going'. "So what's this about? I need to get back to cooking before the chili burns."

"This is far more important than chili Logan." Scott said,as the other (except Kurt) nodded. "This is an Intervention."

"Maybe I should just go check on the chili." Kurt said softly,as he stood to do just that.

"No!" Bobby yelled. "No one in the Circle of Healing can leave or it will ruin everything and Logan will never admit he has a problem, and then we'll never get the cable back...and Logan will never get better,I mean. This is totally about Logan."

"But if the chili burns what will we eat for dinner?" Kurt asked. "I haven't eaten in nearly three hours! I don't think I can wait until they make something else."

"Of course you can Kurt. Here have a cereal bar,it'll tide you over." Said Scott,before he returned his attention to Logan. "We need to do this, for the sake of the team. The world! Mutant/Human relations! And all possible fashion sense."

Logan once again raised an eyebrow, but the other kids all nodded as Scott returned to his seat. After a moment of silence (so the impact of his words could sink in properly) Scott asked who wanted to go first.

Kitty raised her hand and pulled a notebook page out of her pocket. "Logan today I finally finished the email I've been trying to write to my parents for the last week, and like when I went to hit send...when I went to hit send there was no signal. Do you know why there was no signal? Because Xavier turned off the cable so that you could have your precious HAIRSPRAY! Not only is it like totally so two decades ago for you to wear your hair like that, but now you're like interfering in other people's lives! Enough is enough Logan! Like think of the rest of us for a change."

"For a change? All I ever do is think about the lot of you! I'm supposed to be this big bad loner feral and instead I'm playing dorm mother to a group of over dramatic hyper kids! There's nothing wrong with my hair! AND SOMEONE NEEDS TO GO STIR THAT CHILI!"Logan said.

"It's okay guys. We all knew that he would be in denial to begin with. Kitty you go ahead and go stir the chili so Logan can focus, Amara why don't you go next?" Scott said.

Kitty left ignoring the collective groan over the idea of KITTY cooking, as Amara stood, pulled out what appeared to be a gum wrapper and read. "Logan. You're really very selfish with the hairspray, some of us would love to get some hairspray as well. Thank you."

Amara sat down again, and everyone stared at her for a few minutes before finally Jean said. "Do you even use hairspray Amara?"

"No. Why?"

"Never-mind. Jean?" Scott said, trying not to sound as confused as everyone else looked.

"Amara just pretty much stole my speech. So... What Amara said... and I actually used to use before it was cut off for everyone but you, Victor, and John."

"Have you ever seen my hair without hairspray? If you had you would be thanking me for still using it. Besides, I don't use the school's supply. I buy my own, with my own money!" John said.

"Since when do you have money John?" Bobby asked.

"I've always had money. I just don't wave it around."John said.

"We're getting off track here. Who wants to go next?" Scott said. No one volunteered, in fact it looked like most of the group was starting to forget why they were here. Scott was very concerned that this plan would fail due to the group's short attention span, and then they would never get the cable back and he would never learn to make home made snack cakes! Scott was just not willing to let that happen.

"LOGAN! You have to see reason man! You can't just selfishly use up group resources like this! When the Professor asked that we give up a few extras for the good of the team, did you see me complaining? No! I just silently gave up hairspray and I even gave up showering for a month to help out. " Scott said. " When that wasn't enough, I gave up Jean Jr. and tv for four months, and I even gave up revenge of those who offended me for the sake of the team. All we are asking you to do is give up the hairspray so we can get the cable back! Is that too much to ask?"

No one seemed to want to correct Scott about his rant, despite the fact that he had not willingly given up half those things and the other half he gave up because he was too preoccupied with revenge to care about them. It looked like they would be at a stalemate for a long while, but then they all heard from the kitchen." But Remy I like totally know what I'm doing, I was just going to add a little more spice."

"Non, Chaton. Yo were about to add a cup of cinnamon."

Logan stiffened as the others froze, while they continued to listen to the exchange in the other room, which Remy seemed to be losing since Kitty could simply phase through him to add to the pot before Logan finally broke and agreed to think about cutting back on his hairspray use, at least slightly.

The group was greatly relieved as Scott untied Logan and he ran back into the kitchen in hopes of saving the meal from Kitty...and Remy who liked to add spices as well when no one was watching.


	2. Chapter 2 Video Games

Intervention

Chapter Two

Video Games

The kids were proud of the progress they had made with Logan. It had been twenty minutes since he had run into the kitchen to save dinner and so far,he hadn't even noticed his hair was going limp. This may have been because he was distracted by his argument with Kitty and Remy over the chili, not that the kids noticed it. No instead what they noticed was Kitty was still arguing that she wanted to help, but Remy had long ago wandered off.

Scott was thinking about this as Logan roared with such rage that Kitty finally gave up with a huff. It occurred to Scott that Remy seemed to have a very short attention span. In fact, when he thought about it, the only time Remy seemed to actually manage to sit still and pay attention was while he was playing video games. If Remy could just channel that focus into other things, perhaps he would have avoided the blood feud between him and Scott. Or at least noticed that they were in the middle of a blood feud.

As Scott pondered this further,he began to wonder why it was they had ever been afraid of this other boy, but then the answer came to him like a light bulb going off over his head...or John mentioning how much better it was to live a the mansion since when it had been just Magneto they hadn't been allowed to play video games in the house.

Everyone else had returned to the rec room in hopes that the cable was working again. (It wasn't, of course)Which is were Scott found them all, Bobby and Kurt bemoaning their failure at getting tv back by fixing Logan plan.

"Of course the cable is still down. Logan isn't the only one in need of an Intervention." Scott said as he sat down."Logan is just one part of the problem. I mean the Professor is always worried about the high utility bills, and how do you suppose we end up using so much power?"

"Um, Danger Room and Cerebro come to mind."said Bobby.

"Maybe the fact that no one ever remembers to turn out the lights?" said Kurt.

"How about the fact that we have eighteen different people trying to blow dry their hair at the exact same time every morning?" Said Poitr.

"Hey!" said Jean, Bobby, Amara, Kitty, John, Wanda, Tabitha, Kurt, Scott, Lance, Jamie, and Rhane. Poitr just shrugged feeling his point had been made.

"Well there is also the phone chargers, laptops, stereos, and tvs everyday." Jean said, while frowning at her phone's power level.

"No! Remy! He's always playing those stupid games. It eats up so much power, and money for new games, and think about it... Remy use to scare most of us and now he can't even finish a fight with Logan before he wanders back to his games. He's addicted."

Everyone groaned before Jean said."Scott I thought you were going to let go of this Gambit obsession."

"Don't you see Jean?All this time I thought he was just messing with me, but now I see how wrong I was! It's not Remy's fault! He needs an intervention." Scott said as he stood back up.

There were two ways they could handle this. They could let Scott go down this dark road again, or they could humor him and help him with the intervention which should end this right now before anyone had to go spend a week in the middle of nowhere again. Hopefully. There was the third 'Go tell an adult' option but none of them really considered that. They all thought about for a minute, and all realized they were bored, so they decided to do the right thing.

~0~O~0~

Remy hummed happily to himself as he waited for Rogue to return from the bathroom, the game paused just as he had promised, when there was a strange sound behind him. Before he could react, a pillowcase was thrown over his head as ropes wrapped around his arms and torso. Now much like Logan, Remy had trained for years to avoid capture. Unlike Logan, Remy hadn't seen who exactly was grabbing him.

The following trip down to the dining room therefore was painful and bloody for his escorts. Thankfully, Kurt and Scott were there in seconds thanks to Kurt teleporting them. They then tied Remy to the chair as he kicked and punched at them, before removing the pillowcase. He blinked at his surroundings taking in the dining room full of his teammates all wearing their best 'we're here for you' faces.

Relieved it wasn't his father or some crazy mutant scientist intent on experimenting on him, or something like that, Remy relaxed slightly and assumed this was likely some new training exercise or something. Then he saw Scott up from and center of whatever this was. Remy groaned. He had been fairly easy going and lighthearted over this whole 'enemy/friend' thing, after all it wasn't uncommon for him to acquire enemies.

This was too much though! It was bad enough that Scott had managed to get the others to join in on this, but they had manged to get the jump on him! HIM! Remy Etienne LeBeau! Prince of Thieves. Whatever was his father going to say when Remy told him about this? ( Much like the idea of knocking, it never occurred to him to NOT tell his father about this. It was his father! ) No, this was completely unacceptable. Remy was so busy mentally mono-logging in this vein, that he nearly missed it when Scott began to talk.

"Remy. We are your friends, we just want to help you through this video game addiction that's taking over your life." Scott said.

"What video game addiction? Is that even a thing?" Remy said while trying to move his hand into place so he could begin untying himself.

"Yes, Remy, and this is an intervention." Scott said

"... The cable's out again isn't it?" Remy said after staring at them all for a minute.

"Yeah." was said collectively, before Scott insisted one had nothing to do with the other on any level what so ever. Then he began his speech. " Remy, as your friend and roommate it is my duty to tell you that video games are taking over your life. You forget homework. You skip on on chores. You didn't even notice our feud for the first few weeks! Then you kept forgetting about it!"

"Is it really a feud when it's one-sided?" Remy said.

"Yes it is, don't interrupt." Scott said "You spend all your free time up in Rogue's room playing those stupid games, and you've never so much as flirted with her despite claiming to be a huge 'ladies' man'. Logan doesn't even worry about it! Now your addiction has begun too affect the rest of us. The high cost of your games and the energy bills they create has forced the Professor to turn off the cable and there was a very import show on tonight!"

"I thought you said this had nothing to do with the cable?" Remy said."Plus I already recorded your snack cake documentary last week for you, it's on my laptop."

"It doesn't have anything to do with- wait you did? I always knew there was a reason we were friends!"Scott said, before getting up, untying Remy, and running from the room.

"So much for it not having to do with tv."Remy said. "So are we done here?"

"No." said Jean. "Scott may be easily distracted Remy, but the rest of us are still here to help you. Now Bobby knows all about these interventions and he led Logan's which went really well so I think we should listen to him."

"Right, so who wants to go first?" Bobby said. He was a bit nervous over the stormy look on Remy's face.

"I'll go." said Kurt., pulling out a post it filled with his speech that was written hastily while Scott was talking. "Remy, man. We all love video games. You should share more. Especially now that there's no more tv."

"You guys are really bored ain'tcha?" Remy said.

Logan chose that moment to walk into the room to inform them that dinner was done cooking and they had five minute to set the dining room straight or skip dinner. This idea alarmed several of the kids, especially Kurt, but Remy as well who had managed to add more spice to the pot while Logan was busy earlier.

"If I agree to bring down my old playstation will you let me go now?" Remy asked and the others all agreed. Mostly because they had already grown bored with this game (too much talk not enough fighting) and also because they were hungry.

As everyone set the table and chairs back in place Remy said. "Besides, if anyone's the reason for the latest budget cuts, it's Vicky with all his nail polish and files. I pay for my games out of my own money."

"Wait, Victor uses nail polish?" Jean said.

"Of course." said Remy, John, and Poitr. Jean pondered this. Perhaps Scott and Bobby had a point, the budget thing was really out of control after all, plus that explained what happened to her missing nail polish this week.

~0~O~0~

Professor Charles Xavier sat at the head of the table, and noted how well mannered and quiet the children were behaving tonight. He had been reconsidering his decision to cut the cable off for the rest of the month as to harsh of a punishment for the taco food fight of last night, but perhaps it was working after all. He was completely unaware of the children's real intentions, just very happy with the results.

Meanwhile, the students all were on their best behavior, in hopes of avoiding any broken dishes or anything of the sort that may end up coming out of the budget and further hindering their chances of getting the tv back. Sadly, among the eighteen teenagers that lived in the mansion at the moment, only Rogue was paying attention this morning well enough to know that they were being punished and that it had nothing to do with the budget.

In Remy's (very flimsy) defense, he never paid attention., as Scott had pointed out earlier. Scott himself was terrible at attention anymore as well. Wanda had decided not to bother even coming to this morning's meeting,relying on John to tell her what was said however John had been busy plotting a scene in his latest story so had just invented something about changing fabric softner as the reason for the meeting. Everyone else had just been bored and tired so hadn't really listened.

Scott finally joined them in the dining room just as dinner was winding down with a wild look on his face that made the others fear for their lives. Which is to say they feared for their chances of getting the cable back after all. This fear was confirmed when Scott said excitedly. "Professor! Can I have a twenty dollar advance on my allowance? I promise to make enough dessert for everyone to share."

Xavier opened his mouth to respond when a half filled bowl of chili smacked Scott in the face. Bobby stood at the other end of the table as everyone else sat in shock, breathing heavily. "Scott, we were this close. THIS. CLOSE. To getting the budget under control and ask to borrow money?! Why are you so selfish?!"

"Selfish? I said I would share!" Scott said, wiping chili off his face and avoiding the shattered bowl at his feet.

"Why would you need twenty anyway? It can't cost that much to make your stupid cake." Bobby said as he grabbed another bowl from the table, this time Kurt's, and threw it.

Scott ducked, and the bowl crashed against the wall leaving a stain that made Xavier growl in a very Logan like fashion." Because I'm making enough for everyone!" Scott said.

"No! You're letting you obsession affect the rest of us, just like Logan and Remy did! You need an intervention almost as much as Victor!" Bobby said.

"I need a what now?" Victor said,finally looking up from his chili.

"Don't worry about it, it's some new game of theirs." Logan said, still shoving chili into his own bowl in hopes of eating his fill before the pot was thrown as well.

"Enough!" Xavier said, in his usual calm voice that seemed to have a greater impact than a yell ever could. " I think we may need to extend the cable ban another few weeks ."

The kids all groaned,half blaming Scott for asking for money, the other half blaming Bobby for breaking dishes. One thing was certain though. They needed to fix a few more people around here so they could get the cable back.


	3. Chapter 3 Nail Polish

Intervention

Chapter Three

Nail Polish

Victor grumbled as he scrubbed the stain off the wall before it could set. He was picturing the smug look on Logan's face when Charles and Erik had agreed that since Logan had prepared dinner and was doing the dishes it wasn't fair to ask him to clean the dining room as well. Further they had agreed that the children would just make a bigger mess if they were left to do it (plus Charles was worried that the stain wouldn't come off if left to long). Then Ororo and Henry both remembered something they urgently had to attend to Mystique turned into a cat and disappeared, and Erik mumbled something about paperwork.

Really it had been an adult version of '1-2-3 not me' and Victor hadn't been fast enough with his excuse. Now he was stuck cleaning up this huge mess, and those kids were being way to quiet for his liking. Clearly they were up to something and he really should check on them. Then he noticed a chip on the paint on his right ring finger. This was no good! How was he supposed to look menacing when one of his claws looked more like a nail with paint on it? It was gong to ruin his whole image! He had to fix it now before anyone noticed!

Victor rushed from the room...and into the circle of students. Now it was a given that Victor could over power and escape these children easily. However, he had promised Charles,Erik, his parole officer, and his therapist that he wouldn't harm these kids in any way. Unfortunately, that meant he wasn't ALLOWED to escape them. With another heavy sigh and an attempt to hide his chipped nail in his pocket he let the kids herd him into the rec room where they had set up their new 'healing circle'.

"Okay. So what's this about?" Victor said as everyone settled into their chairs.

"This is an intervention Victor." said Scott as he glared at Bobby, still angry at the younger boy for throwing food at him and accusing him of needing help himself.

"Intervention? I don't need no intervention! I don't do drugs, and I ain't dank since my powers grew to the point where it was pointless."

"There are other reasons, addictions to give an intervention Victor. Like Logan's hair and Remy's games." Bobby said.

"No there really isn't" said Victor. "Y'all are going overboard again."

"You don't get to talk now. You aren't good at calming." said Scott to Bobby as he ignored Victor. Victor sighed, hoping this would be over quickly before they made another mess he was left to clean up.

"Okay, so what am I supposedly addicted to that you lot need to fix?" Victor said, while wondering if smacking the two boys was worth it. On one hand they would revoke his probation. On the other hand, they were really annoying him.

"Nail Polish. You're overuse of nail polish is affecting us all." Scott said, completely unaware that Victor was considering slapping him and Bobby was giving serious thought to freezing him to the floor.

"What?! I don't use nail polish"Victor sputtered out in denial, while burying his hand further into his pocket. This was bad, how did they find out about his nails? He bet it was Logan! Logan had always been jealous of him and his manageable blond locks.

"Everyone knows Victor. We've all known for awhile now, since way before dinner."Scott said. "Now be quiet and let us help you. We got this, we've helped both Logan and Remy overcome their issues and we can help you to if you let us."

Victor snorted in laughter well aware that currently, Remy was upstairs playing his games and Logan was in his room fixing his hair. Clearly they just wanted everyone to just agree with them and they didn't care if anyone actually followed through with any promises made. Hopefully this wouldn't take to long though, he planned on watching a kick fighting championship this evening while he repaired his nails. After all the adults' private cable access hadn't been blocked,just the tvs downstairs.

With this in mind, Victor decided to 'encourage' the kids to get along with it. " So, you gonna read that note or what?"

"Hey! I'm leading this meeting, thank you very much! I'll read my notes when I'm ready and finished my speech." Scott said with a scowl.

"... So have you finished your speech?" Victor said after the room had been silent for five full minutes.

"Yes. Yes I have." Scott said before looking down at his index card. "Victor. You are addicted to nail care. You know it. We know it. Now your addiction is affecting others so it needs to stop.-"

"Even if I _**did**_ paint my nails, which I don't, I don't see how that affects the rest of you." Victor said, cutting off Scott's speech.

"Because...well...actually I couldn't care less about your nails, this one was actually Jean's idea. Jean?" Scott said before sitting down.

Jean stood with no notes at all but looking very annoyed as she held up her clean paint free nails for all to see. " Someone stole all of my nail polish this week. At first I assumed it was one of the younger girls or even maybe Remy. We all know he takes stuff for no reason at times. Then it was brought to my attention that you're always painting your nails. That's how you're hurting others, you stole from me and made me think it was one of my friends!"

"Jean, you aren't supposed to accuse, you're supposed to support. And cry. Tears always help." Bobby said.

"I didn't take your stuff kid. For one thing, I don't need to steal from you, for another thing do I really look like I use pink or red nail polish?" Victor said, while the kids all nodded. His logic was prefect, none could think of a counter to it. "Plus, I don't wear nail polish. My nails are naturally black and pointed, like claws. It's not like I need to paint them to ensure that I continue to look scary even though I've been reduced to car pools and parent teacher meetings like some soccer mom."

The image of Victor as a soccer mom was too much for several of the kids. Some were now envisioning it with humor, others with fear, but either way they were no longer convinced he used nail polish at all. Jamie, Rhane, Bobby, and Amara were also all now trying to think of someone else they could beg to take them to their next soccer game. Because the idea of Victor as anyone's mom scared them a lot.

Victor for his part, was amused by their fear. This should put an end to this nonsense and he could go back to his nail maintenance without fear of real discovery...because he knew he would never hear the end of it if Logan found out. In hindsight,perhaps it wasn't the best idea to constantly make fun of Logan's hair regimen when he had his own little secret. Not that he planned on stopping now. No In fact he was going to have to go further with it,less Logan begin to suspect he was going soft or something. In fact he may want to do something drastic,like put gum in Logan's hair or shave it or something. First though he had to get away from these kids and fix his nails.

Just when he was trying to decide how to get out of this without taking his hand out of his pocket, Remy and Rogue came into the room with a game console in Remy's hands and a stack of movies in Rogue's. Remy raised an eyebrow at the others before Rogue said. "Y'all know if you keep tying people up you're never getting t.v. Back right? C'mon I brought you down my movies you ain't seen yet."

With that Victor was declared 'cured' and 'free to go' by Scott. He thought about sticking around long enough to reprimand them for their behavior, but he had some things that needed his immediate attentions. Like Logan's hair (and his nails).

~0~O~0~

Logan had just returned from a nice workout in the danger room, and was about to fix his hair, when all of a sudden he was tackled by Victor and pinned to his carpet. His scream was heard through out the house a few moments later, but no one went to his aide. Everyone knew it was better to stay out of it when Logan and Victor fought, plus video games. So many new unplayed games, that may be taken back any time.


	4. Chapter 4 Snack Cakes

Intervention

Chapter Four

Snack Cakes

Everything was calm this morning, almost as if yesterday had not occurred at all. Remy was happily reading a book at the table, as if he'd never even heard of a video game. ( He was actually reading a player's guide to his newest game, not that the others noticed.) Jean had finally found her missing nail polish, in her bottom drawer and was painting her nails next to Remy. Mystique was making pancakes, Logan and Victor were missing from the scene. Scott had just pulled a thin cake out of the oven, the first step to his new snack cake endeavor. Charles was once more reconsidering the children's grounding.

It had been a pleasant morning all around, as Wanda joined them at the table. Then Todd decided it was a good time to flirt with Wanda. This was when things started to go bad for the kids again. Wanda hated when Todd flirted with her. It was the primary reason she used to abandon the Brotherhood house in favor of Xavier's before the schools combined and that was no longer an option. There were days everyone still wished that was an option, even Xavier … not that he would ever admit that the children drove him so crazy that he sometimes wished he could lace his evening tea with alcohol...because that would be wrong, and who knew what that could lead to? For all he knew next thing would be Logan in charge, or random people suddenly moving in, or insane fear filled propaganda appearing everywhere. That was likely just some nightmare he had though, that could never happen.

While Charles was busy trying to shake the fear of the idea of that strange alternate time line from his head, Wanda finally had had enough of Todd. She screeched at the top of her lungs as she flung Todd away from her, as well as the contents of the table. While the other children (except Scott and Remy) hid under the table, and the adults all tried in vain to calm the angry girl, Todd sputtered. "Wanda, baby,I just lo-"

That was all the farther he got. As Remy casually moved his coffee cup without looking up from the book he was reading, and Scott happily placed the still warm pan of cake on the counter Wanda screeched again, this time flinging Todd just past Remy (who's coffee would have spilled had he not moved it) and into Scott (Knocking the cake pan off the counter in the process.) As Rogue finally walked in for breakfast.

Seeing Scott's expression,she decided she was returning to bed and turned back around. Remy looked up with a raised eyebrow. Charles tried to sooth over the situation with a 'rational and calming tone'. Mystique placed more pancakes on the table as if none of this had happened. Kurt,Bobby, and Jamie sat back down after seeing the pancakes. Jean cried at the sight of her split nail polish which had also been in Todd's path. Kitty and Amara were still hiding under the table. John and Tabitha stood in the doorway undecided on how the should go, the rest of the children fled. Logan and Victor finally arrived , just as Scott recovered from the shock. "Nooooooooooooo-" Scott screamed, as he dramatically fell to his knees.

"Well Wanda. Welcome to the club." Remy said as he closed his book, set down his empty cup, and walked from the room.

~0~O~0~

Later.

Much Later.

Much Much Later.

Finally the adults had calmed Scott enough that he was actually able to speak again, though whether this was an improvement was up for debate, since all he would say was "She murder my snack cakes." over and over again.

Everyone had hoped that Scott was over this obsession by now. Especially as he was being so well behaved recently. "Everybody" being the adults, of course. The other kids knew Scott was still being, well, Scott. In fact, As they watched their teacher try to calm him, with no real success they knew what they had to do if they wanted to help him, and get the cable back on. Helping him, was _**of course**_ their main motivation. It had very little to do with wanting a chance to torture the boy who had been driving them all crazy for months now...somehow they had to get Remy to join them this time. Scott would have to see it if even his friend/enemy was there,right?

With this in mind, Bobby slipped away to go convince (bribe) Remy to join them in their intervention.

~0~O~0~

Scott had gone back to bed. This worried his housemates, though he was unaware of it. He had decided the best way to ensure that he didn't get grounded again, was to pretend the most recent _**murder**_ of his beloved snack cakes didn't bother him and the only way too do that was to not look at the murders in question...or Remy who though he had forgiven, was also a previous offender. Therefore Scott was laying in his bed with his covers over his head when they came for him.

He knew as soon as he felt the ropes slip around him that the worst had happened. Clearly the others had confused him for Remy. And now they were going to try and get Remy to admit his issues, which was never going to happen because he wasn't Remy and then Remy would never get better and he was never going to regain his long time best friend of three and a half weeks! Instead he and Remy were likely going to end up being enemies again, and their blood feud would re-ignite over something impossible for the others to understand and Scott would never get to finish making his snack cakes! Unless...unless he somehow convinced the others that he was indeed Remy and that Remy was better then he fixed Remy himself! Then together they could take revenge on the snack cake murder, make a batch of homemade snack cakes (which would be great, Remy was an awesome cook) and all would be right with the universe. All Scott had to do was make it through this meeting.

This was his plan, and indeed was a fair strategy (for Scott it even seemed rather rational), so he allowed himself to be carried downstairs without protest, into the rec room, and tied to a chair. At this point he remembered that Remy would never have come peacefully and cursed himself for not thinking of it sooner. Then they removed the pillowcase from his head and he saw, sitting exactly across from him and already looking twitchy and bored... Remy. Somehow Remy had convinced the others that he was Scott and Scott was him! Wow, thought Scott, he must really hate being restrained to go this far! Clearly he needs major help.

Scott was so caught up in his concern for Remy's sanity that he missed the first four speeches completely. He nodded occasionally and apologized at the end of each without really listening to anything. After all, this was really for Remy so perhaps just by listening to all of this by proxy it would get through to him after all. Then Rogue stood to give her speech and Scot started listening halfway through it when he noticed that Remy had a notebook page as well and was giving a speech for Scott.

"- and you've caused so much chaos around here I'm pretty sure you've driven nearly everyone completely insane over it! It's not that important, and this is coming from me! ME! I love chocolate as much as the next girl but seriously-" Rogue was saying. Scott again stopped listening when he realized that even Rogue was concerned with Remy's behavior! There was hope after all! "Are you even listening to me, Scott?" Rogue asked as Scott's eyes glazed over and a huge grin spread across his face.

"Of course not, he convinced he's winning again, whatever that means this week." Bobby said in frustration.

"Maybe we should just leave him to the grown ups, we can't help him when he won't listen."Kitty said. "Plus we were going to go to the mall like an hour ago."

Tabitha, Amara, Jubilee, Jean, and Rhane all jumped up to rush to the car when reminded of this. Bobby, Sam, Roberto, Lance, Piotr, and Jamie all hid at the idea of being drug along. Scott was still completely unaware of the true nature of this intervention, and Rogue, Wanda, John, and Remy were just bored, so they left...and Scott suddenly realized he was still tied to the chair. And all alone.


	5. Chapter 5 Enough Already

Intervention

Chapter Five

Enough Already

Scott waited patiently for the others to remember him... for roughly three seconds, before he began plotting his revenge, and a grand total of five minutes before he tried to let himself loose. He had reasoned that since Remy could get free from something like this in less than a minute and Rogue and Wanda had proven they could in less than ten, then of course he (as their leader) should have no trouble getting free. After he landed painfully (and loudly) on his face, Scott remembered something important. All three of the people in question were the children of crazy people who expected their kids to be able to do this stuff.

This thought made him feel better as he flipped onto his side , before he remembered that Kurt could have gotten free too but Kurt was raised by normal- not tying up their own kid- people. How had he ended up in this situation? Surely if Kurt, who as he had just thought of, could get out of this as well as the three others he could. He was the leader! He had been training for the last four years! He was Scott Summers; Cyclops; Great Defender of the Weak and murdered snake cakes! Yet he couldn't get out of a simple double _constrictor knot. In fact, the more he struggled, the more it seemed to tighten. He loudly cursed Bobby, who had tied the knot. Bobby must have been a Boy scout or something, otherwise how would he have such knot tying skills? When were they planning on coming back for him anyway?_

 _This was when Scott remembered the others thought he was Remy (or so he thought) and it was unlikely they would come back, after all Remy could have gotten out of this and already be back in their room playing a stupid game again by now. Scott was torn between wanting to call for help (his arms were starting to hurt in this position, laying on one as he was) and wanting to get out of this himself since asking for help might look bad for a Leader._

 _He was also now plotting his revenge against all of the other students...but that would come later._

 _~O~0~O~_

 _Charles, Logan,Victor, Raven,Ororo,Henry, and Erik were sitting in Charles' office trying to work out the budget again. This was a frequent endeavor that never ended well. There were just too many repairs,expenses,taxes,groceries, and Charles's gambling to balance properly. Plus whenever someone (Erik) mentioned Charles' gambling, it caused a great deal of denial, followed by a minor argument, followed by Raven (Mystique) threatening to take her bank accounts,leave her wards, and walk away. The fight always ended here. The last thing they needed was less money and more kids. There would be more kids, even if she had to go find more herself, she said so every time._

 _The kids meanwhile were being far too quiet for any of the adults liking, and it was decided that someone should go check on them. Logan and Victor both refused after what happened yesterday. Henry remembered a very important report he had to deliver to the Governor this morning. Charles and Erik pointed at the budget and a clap of thunder decided that it was Raven's turn._

 _Around the time the girls arrived at the mall, the boys escaped into the woods, and the others hid upstairs Raven slipped out of the front gate in the shape of a cat. Surely they were all fine, but she had no intention of having to clean up whatever crazy game or prank they had come up with this week. Perhaps it was time to split the teams up and go back to battling each other. Sure there was nothing really to fight over, but keeping that many kids under one roof seemed like a worse plan every day. Seriously, what were they all thinking when they decided it was a good idea to put all these kids together? Then if that wasn't bad enough they combined their households, putting even more kids together! It was no wonder they were all going slowly insane._

 _~O~0~O~_

 _The cable was_ _ _still__ _out. Something that Bobby just discovered when he sat down to watch a movie. This made no sense to him! They'd done everything right! They'd fixed everyone's problems, they'd behaved all morning, they'd even managed to avoid going to the mall with the girls without blowing anything up (this time...last week there may have been a small explosion over going to the mall that_ _ **might**_ _have taken out a large chunk of the west lawn, but no one was willing to lay claim on who did it so as far as the kids were concerned it didn't happen)_

 _Bobby began pacing the room. Where was Scott when you needed him? He'd probalby have a good idea who might be left that needed fixing. Bobby could ask the Professor but he would probably interfere and say- that it! Bobby knew who needed help the most! Now to gather the others. This was going to require every one to help._

 _A few minutes later, Bobby had manged to get everyone but Scott into the war room. For some reason none of the kids understood Scott wasn't responding to either his communicator or his texts. They assumed he was sulking somewhere and left it at that. It didn't occur to any of them that they had never untied Scott when they left him an hour ago. Though there was much grumbling about Bobby when the shoppers realized the ' 911' text Bobby had sent them was just a trick to get them home. Then Bobby explained his latest plan, and everyone nodded in understanding. How had they not seen it before? Of course he needed the most help of all. After all Xavier was the one who paid the bills, clearly his terrible tendency to collect more people was costing them the cable._

 _~O~0~O~_

 _Charles was aware the children were after him. He wasn't the world's most powerful psychic for nothing after all. Though he tended to intentionally block out the thoughts of those around him, especially in the mansion, it would have been impossible to miss the combined thought process of nearly every student. All but Remy and Scott. Remy was impossible to read, and Scott was busy with some plot that Charles was choosing to ignore. A choice he would soon regret since if he had followed Scott's line of thinking, perhaps he wouldn't now be hiding himself trying to figure out a way to convince the students he didn't actually need an intervention._

 _Apparently he wasn't going to escape this however, because Jean had just informed the others he was hiding in his bathroom and there wasn't a second door out of here. Bobby and Kurt appeared in a cloud of smoke a moment later and before Charles could respond in any way they grabbed him and with a second telepotation he found himself on a chair in the Rec room._

 _All of the children sat surrounding his chair, except for Scott who he could clearly see still trying to untie himself from a fallen chair just outside the circle. When the others had come in to set up for Charles they had found Scott like this. He's managed to crawl this far, and when Remy offered to untie him he had refused insisting he could get out of it himself. Scott felt he was close now and was determined to prove he could do it. No one felt the need to point out to him that he's been trying for the last hour and the knots were still completely intact._

 _Bobby sat down directly across from Charles and pulled out a notebook which he had written a several page long speech inside. He cleared his throat and Charles began before he could. "Enough of this foolishness already children. Over the last three days you have managed to torment nearly everyone in this house in some manner or another including each other. No amount of kidnappings and interventions is going to lift your grounding any sooner. In fact if you persist in this manner I will have no choice to have have the cable turned off completely instead of simply blocked for a week."_

 _"We get it back next week?" Jamie asked._

 _"I knew that." said Rogue._

 _"Then why-"_

 _"Oh cause if I didn't help y'all you'd tie me up. Plus I was bored."_

 _"Untie Scott, return my chair, and find something less instructive to do now." Charles said._

 _"Buuuut." Kitty whined. "We got called back from the mall really early, and I spent like a whole lot of time on my speech and now I'm totally never going to get to give it."_

 _"Fine. If you untie Scott and return my chair, I promise to listen to your speech and tell you if it was any good." Charles said. Kitty clapped happily, but no one else seemed interested in giving their speeches anymore as they untied Scott and retrieved Xavier's chair._

 _"Professor. You are like totally addicted to helping people and like taking in strays, and it's like totally affecting your ability to pay your bills. You should probably like, wait at least a few months before taking in anyone else...and maybe like start charging us tuition or rent or something." Kitty read. "umm... you know now that I'm reading this out loud it's totally sounds stupid. Never mind Professor. Just forget all about this, it's not really up to us how you run things around here after all, and really it would be stupid for you to take the advise of a bunch of teenagers anyway and RUN BEFORE HE CUTS OUR ALLOWANCE!"_

 _Collectively, the majority of the Xavier's student body moved toward the door, except for John and Wanda who jumped out of the window; Remy and Rogue who continued to sit on the couch where they had moved after Scott was untied; Scott who continued to lay on the floor insisting he could do it himself; and Piotr who had just entered the room after going to fetch Scott a glass of water and missed what had happened._

 _Charles had no intention of suddenly charging the students money, but if the thought was what kept them behaving for the next few hours, he would let them think he had liked the idea. After all, all he really wanted was for them to all behave._

 _The important part was that they had finally put this latest game behind them, and things were returning to normal._

 _END_

 _A/N:_

 _Thank you all for reading, I hope it was enjoyed. Sorry for the late posting of the last chapter._

 _As far as the question concerning the Babysitting Stories: Neither the Babysitting Series, nor the Define Normal Series is complete however I have no current project for the Babysitting Series at the moment. It will likely have to wait until after the Holidays._


End file.
